Let's Get Serious

Stop Hating on Self-Love

When did loving yourself become so rare, that it’s revolutionary to do so?

Y’all, I have some things that I need to get off of my chest. I don’t ever usually have an outline for my posts, I just write. I start with one idea that constantly beats my brain and I work with it. Majority of the time they are issues that I am passionate about. I believe or hope that y’all can read the passion behind my writings. I don’t ever want to write about something that I am not 100% sure of or that I am not overwhelmed by the passion for it. My goal most of the time is for readers to see another perspective of a certain situation. I want to inform, encourage, inspire, and to make you think. Critically thinking about current events or anything is an important skill. Looking at a situation from every angle is not easy, but my hope is that I am making it easy for y’all. As of late, I have felt like I am being pulled in fifty different directions. I have so many blog posts I want to post but I don’t have the words to express them. I hope that makes sense. I am passionate about so much and I genuinely hope that my posts encourage a passion inside of you.

So with that aside, I want to talk a little about social media and a lot about judging others.

It’s no secret that self-love is an issue that is close to my heart. I have written multiple posts because there is so much I have to say about love and acceptance of ourselves. (Check out my selflove tag).

I do not want this to come off as complaining and me just spewing negativity because those are not my intentions in any way. But I would like to start with society and how we do not promote self-love enough. Obviously this is not a new eye opening thought, we have been saying this since the media forced girls to evaluate their body nightly. I feel it has gotten to the point where people and celebrities are aware of what the media does to people and how it makes them feel about themselves. Unrealistic beauty standards are still shoved in our faces but I am hearing more from celebrities and their problems with these unattainable beauty standards. Zendaya for example released her unedited photo compared to her photo shopped one. On this cycle of Americas Next Top Model they did a photo shoot where they didn’t retouch anything. We have body shaming movements. We have representation for this injustice. We have come a long way from where we used to be with this issue. But, we still have a long way to go.

See, we promote self-love, anti-body shaming, etc. But we don’t accept people who actually love themselves. They’re overconfident, cocky, full of themselves. When a girl agrees with the compliment that is given we get weirded out. For example, Khloe Kardashian released her amazing shoot for Complex and people hated on her confidence. She responded in the best way possible, and shut the negativity down. But people feared her confidence, her self-love. This isn’t a single incident because it is an adjustment to hear that someone is actually confident with themselves. There is also a fear within ourselves to proclaim that we do in fact love ourselves. As much as we don’t want to care about others’ opinions, we can’t help but to be conscious of how we come off to other people. It’s important to remember that their opinion does not define you. I find a lot of comfort in that saying.

It’s so frustrating to me that we judge people more harshly when they actually love themselves. It’s almost like people prefer us to be hating ourselves. They can’t handle our confidence and self-love, so they shut us down immediately. I admit it can be intimidating for both sides of the spectrum. But personally, I would rather be vain than learn to hate myself again.

I believe one of the main factors that come into play when judging others who do love themselves is that they themselves struggle with self-love. We are scared of what we don’t understand. It’s much easier to attack someone than to understand why they love themselves. Here’s the thing, not everyone is going to like you. There will be people that hate you because they simply hate you. They might have  reason, good or bad, and they might not have any reason at all. The faster you can accept this the faster you can get on with loving yourself.

You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches. -Dita Von Teese


We do not exist to please others. Once we finally understand that we can radically love ourselves and encourage others to do the same. Rejoice in everyone’s strengths rather than tear apart their weaknesses. Love and positivity to y’all.

xo- Heidi



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